I'm watching this video about a sound artist who works with marimbas. Have I truly lost my contact with sound, in the arts, in projects. I know that with the Spirits, Souls and Ghosts I am limiting myself but doing so in order to achieve an end, a style, a clearly recognizable vision.

I want to see what gifts I am given through to their fullest potential, their very fullest potential. I do think of sound and video from time to time and about who I was earlier in my life. How do I let go of the past without damaging my roots? Did I want to damage my roots? To uproot myself from my own developed being, to escape the coalescence of acts, activities and combinations that arose in my life? Yes I believe so. I got myself caught up in some webs, some very sticky existential webs that I had invested serious psychic energy into. I had to rip away from it it was stuck so hard.

So in my present I am someone new. I am remade. I am what I will be now going forward, developing further. Enjoy every step of your journey like that girl in the TED talk said. I want to make true art to my soul as it is now not how it was or certainly not how I thought it would be.

I AM an artist.

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